Fifteen years ago today

Fifteen years ago today, my mother went to be with the Lord. I was only a fifteen month old and my little sister Lindsey was almost a month old. I don't remember my mom at all, but I wish I did. I heard about what an incredible woman she was and I wish I would've known what she was like. My dad tells me that I am like her in some ways, which makes me happy.

But, I used to be angry towards God. I didn't understand why He took her. I used to think, "How could you do this to our family?" I wanted some answers... I never got them. As I grew older, I started to realize that God took her home for a reason... I wasn't sure what that was until I was seven years old. He provided me with a new family and MANY friends, years later. I realize now that it was TOTALLY wrong for me to be angry at God. I was angry, upset, hurt, and mostly confused. I couldn't understand it at 7. At sixteen, I realize God's plan is incredible and for my own good.. So I should just TRUST Him. :)

Job 1:20- ". . .The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised." 

Today, He will be PRAISED. There will probably be lots of sadness, but there will be happiness, too! She is in heaven! That is where we all want to end up. Now she no longer has to go through pain or suffering. The Lord was good with His plan... I will always remember that when something bad happens, because something good will probably come out of it in the end.

My God is SO good! :) Today, I have a smile on my face.... I'm rejoicing and praising God today for this milestone in my life... What about you? :)

Love & God Bless,

~Megan

Perfect.

PERFECTIONIST

A person who demands perfection from themselves or others.

I am a perfectionist. At least that is what I always try to be..... My mindset is always set on perfect. If something is not perfect, I get extremely frustrated. I try hard with everything I do to be perfect. I want to be a perfect person without making mistakes. But we all know that that works out well, don't we?!

ATELOPHOBIA

Fear of imperfection.

I have a fear of screwing up..... Yet every day, I find a way to screw up. When I do, I'm absolutely devastated. It's a daily thing for me... I constantly have to remind myself that it's okay not to be perfect. Because, no one is.. except Jesus. HE is holy. HE is blameless. HE is spotless; without blemish. HE is perfect. HE is sinless.

We all suffer every day with being imperfect. There's no possible way while we're living on this earth that anything can be perfect. The only thing we can do is to STRIVE to be perfect. 

James 1:4, "And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing."

This verse says, "that you may be PERFECT and complete, lacking in NOTHING. Which means we'd have to be just like Jesus to fulfill this. That's going to be pretty hard when we're sinful human, right? Yes... It's going to be EXTREMELY hard to fulfill this.

Matthew 5:48, "You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect." 

It's hard to explain these verses in the Bible about how to be perfect, because I'm not perfect. Nor will I ever be. Sometimes I wish I was and that I could understand things like that this through and through, but I don't and I can't. I struggle with perfectionism every day of my life. I try to do everything right, and when I don't.... My fear of failing gets ahead of me and I pray asking God WHY I just can't do everything right... Then I remember that I was created sinful, but in God's image. It's hard trying to be perfect and then failing.

This is my daily struggle.... What's YOURS?

Love & God Bless,

~Megan