My Heart Speaks Part 2

In a little over a month, I will be twenty-two. It's really crazy, considering ten years ago I thought twenty-two was "old". *insert laughing/crying emoji here* But really, I'm still very young. I have so much life ahead of me. I definitely feel like I am a bit behind in life, considering most people my age are finishing college and off to their "adult jobs". I dropped out of college, moved to a different town, took a few different jobs, and landed myself at a grocery store job. Not necessarily a bad thing, but it's not where I want to end up.

I know that I am currently where I am at because of my limitations. But on the bright side, I have a steady paycheck, I'm able to get from Point A to Point B, and overall save more money because I'm living back with my parents. I don't think that is a bad thing or makes me any less of a person, either. It's actually smart to live at home so you can save your money and move out into the world and live your own life. The only reason I mention that is because I prematurely moved out on my own at eighteen, against a lot of people advising me not to. But it's a lesson I learned the hard way. Do I regret it? No. I wouldn't have learned what I did if I hadn't. Do I wish I had gone about it a different way? Heck yes! I went through some really hard lessons during that season of my life. It's something I don't ever want to repeat in the future. But I'm thankful for what I did learn so I know what to do differently the second time around.

I think life is just a series of adventures and you can choose where you end up. You don't have to settle for your life the way it currently is. You have the power and a choice to change your outcome. Someone in my life that I respect and think very highly of told me this and I was not happy when he said it. To be honest, it angered me but I'm glad I was angry because I needed to hear it. One of his famous quotes I hear all the time, "If it's not important enough to you, you won't make it a priority". He said that I was the only one that could make a difference in my life. I am the only one that can choose what food I put in my body and whether or not I exercise, which is 100% true. It's a mindset and a lifestyle. Ever since he said it, it has stuck with me. It's amazing that I'm even saying it because I was so mad. (Funny how that works, isn't it?) But it actually makes a ton of sense.

One thing I would like to work on in my twenty-second year is bettering myself, whether it is working out and eating right, finding another job, going back to school, etc. I want this to be my year of change and growth. I don't want to be in the same place a year from now. I'd like to have different goals and hopefully accomplish bigger things by twenty-three. I think that's something that a lot of people say and do nothing about, but I don't want that to be the case for me.

The second thing I have wanted to work on is my self image. I've struggled with thinking positively and looking at all my strengths. Instead I've focused my mind on all the negatives and what I am currently, not what I COULD be. I don't want to look back when I'm forty years old and be miserable. I want to be forty years old and look at my life and see all that I've accomplished in twenty years and be satisfied with who I've become as a person. I know I have SO much room for improvement and growth and that's going to be my main focus. Life is about growth, about change, about improvement, and about becoming the person you truly want to be.